Posted by gaylistbookreviews
Author: M. King
Publisher: Dreamspinner Press
Length: 210 pages
Rating: A List
Blurb: Does gender really matter?
Kel and Toni are damaged people trying to find answers. While Kel pins his hopes on support groups to keep him on the straight and narrow, Toni looks for absolution in a bottle of Mexican hormone pills.
Kel loves Toni obsessively, and though he supports them on the money he makes turning tricks with strangers and regular clients, he struggles with the reality of Toni’s transition and her motives for doing it.
While Kel grapples with his worries and the attentions of regular client Michael—otherwise known as the Sherbet Pervert—Toni faces different problems. Danielle, a transgender woman, best friend and role model to Toni, thinks Kel is a bad influence and pushes Toni to leave him. But Toni holds off because deep down, she knows she’s not like Danielle.
Kel and Toni’s desperate attempts to build a life together make them realize their survival is precarious. And then two unrelated events show them how easily their harsh little world can crumble, bringing them to confront some difficult truths.
Review: A well written compelling story of loyalty and devotion with such realism of truth and despair. The characters are both pushed emotionally beyond what some couples may think is extremely unreasonable, but love runs so deeply between them that despite what their heads might tell them, their hearts hold on, never giving up.
Kel loves Toni to the core, though he is unsure of his feelings for the changes that Toni is making. A part of Kel feels that Toni has made a mistake and doesn’t know what he wants, but through it all Kel supports Toni with it all. Toni is his honey, and he’ll risk all to help her get everything she needs to be Iher. Even when Kel feels like running and doesn’t feel he can cope with Toni’s emotional breakdowns, the bitching mood swings and the physical changes, Kel stays, he stands by his honey; he loves Toni regardless of gender.
Toni loves Kel deeply, they are good together. And she worries what effect the changes from a him to a her will have on their relationship. She knows it’s not what Kel wants, but feels this is the only way to make her feel better as if all her problems will fade away when she becomes a woman. Toni knows the pills are making her irritable, picky and overemotional more so than ever and even though her best friend Danielle tells her she should see a doctor and not self medicate, she doesn’t listen, she’s not as fortunate as Danielle to get things done properly. And she knows Kel gets concerned about the online medication orders too.
The emotions and the thoughts you get from Kel and Toni through these pages are so very real, the tears, the tantrums and the fears. They are young and don’t know what the future holds for them. Kel has stopped the drugs, but still works as a prostitute, which puts his life in danger in more ways than one. Toni has given up both drugs and prostitution and has a small job at a bookstore, although not very confident and lacking enthusiasm she perseveres with it, but that is the least of her worries.
This is an amazing story that I couldn’t put down. I could almost hear what the characters could hear, smell what they smelt, and see what they saw, feeling their emotions, their hopes and their fears.
Reviewed by Teddy
Posted in Teddy
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